Former President Donald John Trump has just won an election, but it’s not the one he currently desires.
Now, if Trump were to lose the primary or general election in 2024, he could assume his rightful place… on the Hubbard Rural Fire Protection District board.
Yes, there is probably a greater possibility of being struck by lightning than Trump accepting a position on the fire department board of a sleepy city in western Oregon.
But the fact that Trump “won” this election at all is a profound indication of the influence he still exerts — a reality that is not insignificant as the United States heads toward the highly contentious 2024 presidential election.
The entire ordeal serves as a stark reminder that political tiebreakers at the local level can be completely arbitrary.
According to the Statesman Journal, the bizarre tale began on May 16, when local Hubbard residents cast their ballots for the tiny board.
Two of the three vacancies on the Hubbard Rural Fire Protection District board were quickly filled, as these positions are not precisely in high demand.
Thus, a number of write-in candidates, including the former president, vied for the third seat.
Twenty write-in candidates received ballots; however, only five, including Trump, garnered two votes each.
Due to the “closeness” of this election, a recount was required to affirm that Trump was tied with four other candidates for the third board seat.
At this juncture, something resembling divine intervention played a role, as the Hubbard board connections are severed by rolling dice.
“We ran this [dice roll] by both our Secretary of State’s Office and our in-house attorney,” Marion County Clerk Bill Burgess said. “It’s been a while since we had to do this.”
Notably, Hubbard is located in Marion County.
On June 23, when the 12-sided dice was rolled, three of the candidates rolled a 10. (Proxies rolled the dice on behalf of the candidates; Trump and the other write-in candidates were not present at this dice roll.)
On the second attempt, Trump’s representative rolled a 12, securing the victory for the former president.
Nobody anticipates that Trump will actually occupy this seat. Notably, Hubbard protocol dictates that if Trump declines the seat, the council must contact the next highest dice roll.
In terms of the upcoming election, the former president has very real, very large fish to feed, despite the fact that the entirety of this narrative is a joke.
Even though Trump is widely regarded as the overwhelming favorite to emerge from the crowded GOP primary field, he must still emerge from that field.
Trump will then have the unenviable task of attempting to unseat an incumbent president.